Announcing the PokéJungle Mario Kart 8 Deluxe Tournament!

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Mario Kart 8 Deluxe was recently released for the Nintendo Switch and we know many of our readers are currently offering everything the game has to offer. Today, however we’re please to announce something fun for the site: The PokéJungle Mario Kart 8 Deluxe Tournament. A bit of a mouthful, right?

Our tournament will start as a one-off event, with the possibility of running weekly tournaments depending on the turn-out! We want our readers to decide the possible date for the first tournament, and as such we are proposing the following dates and times:

OPTION 1
Location Date and Time Timezone
Tokyo (Japan) Sunday, 7 May 2017, 00:00 JST
London (United Kingdom – England) Saturday, 6 May 2017, 16:00 BST
New York (USA – New York) Saturday, 6 May 2017, 11:00 EDT
Los Angeles (USA – California) Saturday, 6 May 2017, 08:00 PDT
OPTION 2
Location Date and Time Timezone
Tokyo (Japan) Sunday, 14 May 2017, 00:00 JST
London (United Kingdom – England) Saturday, 13 May 2017, 16:00 BST
New York (USA – New York) Saturday, 13 May 2017, 11:00 EDT
Los Angeles (USA – California) Saturday, 13 May 2017, 08:00 PDT
OPTION 3
Location Date and Time Timezone
Tokyo (Japan) Monday, 8 May 2017, 00:00 JST
London (United Kingdom – England) Sunday, 7 May 2017, 16:00 BST
New York (USA – New York) Sunday, 7 May 2017, 11:00 EDT
Los Angeles (USA – California) Sunday, 7 May 2017, 08:00 PDT

[poll id=”124″]

We will keep our poll open for 24 hours, after which we will formally announce the dates of our tournament. In the meantime please fire off in the comments below with any questions you may have and we’ll do our best to answer them!

See you on the racetrack!

Supporters

Nick F

Smearg

Foil Island

Conglome NERD

alcremie sundae

Radiant Blutle

Zachery

Dragoniteo

Austin John Plays

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2,513 thoughts on “Announcing the PokéJungle Mario Kart 8 Deluxe Tournament!”

  4. sooooo here’s my biggest pet peeve stopping me from buying MK8D
    i just can’t buy a Mario Kart remake without new courses
    which gave me a idea
    what 4 courses would you like to see as a retro course?
    it can be literally anything that exists

    (and if you really want to go the extra length 4 fan courses)

    Reply

  5. I’d like you all to picture a world where Araquanid has 30 extra base HP and access to aqua jet ….
    Are you scared yet?

    Reply

  6. What are you guys afraid of?

    Spiders, but only big ones. Why must such common, beneficial creatures be so ugly?

    Crabs. Spiders of the sea, but with actual pincers.

    Scorpions. Long spiders with pincers and stingers. Yikes.

    Reply

  7. Opposite! Things that you love? Besides obvious things like family and friends. Nothing sexual please *cough cough Earthworm cough cough*

    Reply

    • Cute animals
      Honest conversations
      Hot drinks
      Sunny days
      Snow days
      Warm rain
      Lots of plant life
      Nature in general tbh
      Dark chocolate

      Its the little things

      Reply

    • The beauty of life and nature, and the way a person looks at things they love. Joy, happiness and kindness. The rain on a tin roof, and a gentle rain when the sun is out that creates a rainbow afterwards. The warm breeze and the sun set and sun rise. The stars and moon shining down on me at night. These are a few of the things I love.

      Reply

          • Haha, was just wondering since I’m always changing name XD

            Although this one makes it really easy to guess :p

            How you holding up? Don’t have to answer if you don’t want, I’m going through some stuff now myself I’m not comfortable sharing here

          • I’m doing well, I’m trying to live by my grandmothers principals for life and becoming someone she would have been proud of, after all heaven is how you are remembered and loved by those you leave behind, to make a difference in the lives of people and live in their hearts forever, you will never truly be gone.

            I am very sorry to hear that you are having some difficulties right now, but just remember your soul is strong and you can get through any obstacle.

          • Aww thanks Fae! I won’t elaborate on my situation, but this has happened before and whilst it’ll be sloppy as it happens it’ll be better for everyone when it ends ^^

            Also, I’m sure your grandma would be so proud of someone as nice as you, and what you’ve said about heaven is beautiful. I hope that you continue with your path and reach the person you wish to be, even if I feel you’re already there ^^

          • Well thats quite a lovely response, I thank you and you will be in my thoughts throughout this tough time of yours, hoping it all works out

    • Cats, videogames, Good Anime, Almost crying, Great Movies, Nature, Summer, Landscapes, Rains, Cloudy climate, Darkness, Salt and finally Chocolate

      Reply

      • Chocolate! What kind? My local supermarket sells dark chocolate with blueberry flavorings in it and it’s positively divine!

        Reply

    • Fiiiine
      -Brutally decapitating traitors
      – Sipping fancy wine out of skulls
      – eviscerating the elderly
      – testing new weapons on wayward travelers
      – and selling human organs to the black market

      Reply

    • Actually in all serious… I just love … well… nature I guess….. and scenery…. I’ve always been big on loving stuff like that…
      Particularly spring (Since summer is too hot and me and heat don’t get along)

      Reply

  9. Last shit post! Pet peeves? Things that tick you off, but nothing that can by themselves really get you angry

    Reply

    • People
      Stupid people
      old people
      stupid old people
      people who don’t participate in online matches
      Wusses
      bulky legends
      Any pokemon with prankster or Serene Grace
      People who shit on games for no good reason
      Feminazis
      SJWs
      Hipsters
      people who don’t understand D&D (and dick around)
      Douchebags

      Reply

    • That moment you want to take a bath/shower and you can’t get the damn thing to be the right temperature, it’s either frigid or scalding

      Reply

    • I’m sorry feel free to agree

      But people who can’t dissociate gender from interests or aesthetics

      Honestly cosmogender feels like some bullshit people would use to insult non binary people but nope some people think their gender is fucking space for some reason

      Not saying non binary is stupid tho, I’m mostly neutral – positive to the ones that aren’t just grabs for attention (such as fluid, a, and a few more)

      Reply

      • I don’t know why it’s hard to understand that it’s a spectrum.

        You are male, female. somewhere in between, a bit of both or non at all (agender)

        You can’t be space

        Reply

      • I mean I understand what you’re saying, I believe non-binary and agender is fine, thats valid af, but then again I also know that there are some people who choose to go into that spectrum and then say or do stupid shit to invalidate trans people, but thats a separate issue.

        I also get peeved when people associate your interests with gender, like, liking pink and playing with dolls doesnt make you a girl, and liking trucks and sports doesnt make you a boy, thats societies concept that they like to enforce and we shouldn’t feed into it. If you are a boy (cis or trans) its because you are one, and the same goes for woman, its a mindset, you can be mtf and like “masculine” things and vice versa

        Reply

        • Exactly. I feel like there is this sorta narrative for trans people that should really be gotten rid of.

          It’s that story you hear where a boy grew up playing with dolls and make up and all that and always knew they were trans.

          Which wasn’t me at all. I played with cars and trains and video games and I drew. Non considered especially “feminine” it took me a long time to know I was trans thus confusing the people around me who think that is how all transgender people are.

          It also hurts boys that just like feminine things. Tough I’ve noticed that it’s a lot more acceptable for girls to play with “boy” toys

          Reply

          • exactly I always cringe a little when I hear someone saying those things, like I’m happy you’re coming out, but you shouldn’t associate it with playing with dolls and such.

            And sadly there is a problem where woman can wear and play with things that are socially seen as male things and no one bats an eye, but when it comes to men being interested in wearing feminine clothing or playing or doing things commonly associated with women, everyone freaks out, and I personally blame sexism, because society deems woman as inferior and like its some awful thing to like things that are geared towards women. Screw the patriarchy, this is why we need feminism.

          • And I think that some of transphobia roots back to sexism too. Because these cis heterosexual men see a transgirl and it just slaps their perception of gender in the face. What they see as a man becoming a woman makes no sense to them because why would a man want to become the “weaker sex”

            They also fail to understand dysphoria and the trouble that faces trans people so they end up adding onto that with transphobia

          • I’m on the flipside. I like really “girly” things, act fairly “feminine”, etc. A lot of people assume that I’m gay because of it, I think?

    • Your questions… JK buddy but what peeves me

      Repeating myself, People who don’t answer questions (aka my brother), mispronounced words such as Creek and Robot, my english class, my German teacher and bees that stalk you when you walk by

      Reply

  10. Well today has been absolutely depressing…
    Turns out studying for an AP test is absolutely draining…

    Reply

  13. Out of curiosity, anyone want to be a character in the Jungle fanfiction I’m writing? It’s actually got a plot that’s solidifying and I’m liking how it’s coming so far tbh

    Reply

  16. Just now…
    Me: (Answering questions about abnormal psychology, just casually)
    Question 14: Mary is sexually aroused by aardvarks…

    I WASN’T READY FOR THAT BIG OF A LEAP

    Reply

  17. Out of the Jungle Prologue

    Seraph. Kuppo. Kurusu. Star. The four had planned this moment for days, a perfect day witch an idyllic picnic with a healthy balance of carbohydrates, meats, vegetables, and desserts. But that all changed when the Fire – Type attacked.

    Seraph smiled to himself as he blissfully munched on his cookies, unaware of the advancing feline behind him. By the time that Kuppo – who had been sat opposite him – even managed to muster up a warning, the boy was in the beast’s shadow.

    He immediately jumped to his feet, scattering all of his delicious cookies to the floor as his head collided with his Hakamo-o’s cold, hard scales.

    Seraph’s world went as black as his little edgelord soul wished to be.

    ~Line Break~

    A gentle, caring breeze gently caressed Seraph’s face. It slowly awoke him, leaving the boy confused as he looked around the room he was in. His dorm room, which he shared with Kuppo.

    His roommate rushed to his side as he let out a yawn.

    “You okay?” Kuppo asked.

    “Forget me! What about the cookies!?”

    Kuppo grimly shook his head.

    Seraph’s eyes began to well with the tears of a thousand emos. “My… my cookies… They were fresh… New to this world…”

    Kuppo patted his friend’s back, and handed him a hot drink.

    “I’m sure the Incineroar didn’t mean to scare you like tha-”

    “THAT’S IT!” Seraph cried. “IT WAS THAT YAOI HANDED BASTARD THAT DID IT! I’LL DESTROY THAT INCINEROAR! DESTROY THEM ALL! I’LL KNOCK ‘EM DOWN FROM RARELY SEEN TO NEVER SEEN!”

    Kuppo had nearly lunged to the other side of the small apartment-style dorm room in order to avoid the hot beverage Seraph and unceremoniously thrown to the floor. He murmured to himself.

    “You must of hit your head off of Hakamo-o harder than we thought…”

    Reply

  18. And chapter 1

    “I’m just saying that with all the magical and technological advancements we should be able to have more than three Pokemon.” Star shrugged, her three Summon Crystals in hand, turning them over as she waited for her food to come. “I’d die for a Furret.”

    “The three Pokemon you choose allow you to use stronger magical spells affiliated with their types than you could on your own. Having more than three familiar Pokemon could be harmful to your body and mind.” Kuppo refuted.

    “Right, but why do Pokemon have to be familiars? It just feels so convoluted, like fair enough some Pokemon can be kept as pets outside of Crystals, but couldn’t we like keep a few more Pokemon in something technological? I think three more to make like, six would be a good number.” Star continued.

    Kuppo sighed. “Look, I’m not saying more Pokemon would be worse, but technology still isn’t as advanced as it would be without magic, and that requires us to use our own Infinity Energy to interact with and manipulate. Tech that stores Infinity Energy to function can’t run for too long, and utilising energy harvested from leaks from the Crystals which is considered heresy in at least half the world and is also expensive, and finally electric based technology is seen as inefficient compared to mag-”

    To Seraph, Kuppo’s speech became white noise as he begun to speak to Kurusu.

    “So buddy, Star tagged along because she has nothing to do over the summer, and Kuppo decided to wet towel me because apparently my goals are ‘unrealistic’ or ‘dangerous’ or some other Tauros shit. Why are you here?”

    A few seconds of silence passed, with Kuppo’s speech and the clattering of the kitchen being the only ambience in the near empty restaurant.

    The boy simply shrugged at his friend, and then turned back to the book in his hands, waiting for his food to come.

    Seraph entertained himself by practicing his Aqua spell, channeling the energy from his Araquanid’s Summon Crystal.

    Hydro magic allowed the caster to manipulate water in its liquid state. With his arachnid familiar, Seraph could manipulate small amounts of water masterfully or have a weak influence on a large body of water. Without his familiar, his magic was similar to the Jungle guild when it wasn’t news time: quiet and not very impressive besides the occasional nuggets of excellency.

    Seraph had pulled a few small bubbles up above his glass when the arrival of his food cost him to accidently throw them up in glee. Droplets rained upon Kurusu, leading to Star to interrupt Kuppo’s still ongoing speech to make a joke about how Seraph getting others damp was a first, which was met by larger bubble hitting her squarely in the face.

    After the meal had been finished, the party decided to have a conversation about how their magical abilities were developing.

    “Hex is fine, Overlord is fine, Swarm is fine, but Combatant, Hydro and Growth are all subpar.” Seraph sighed, making the flowers on the table slightly perk to emphasise how weak his Grass – Affinity magic was.

    Star stretched, before summoning a small wisp of white light in her right palm. “Charm is pretty strong, seeing as I’ve got two familiars for it. My Hydro’s better than Seraph’s, but my Mind and Summon magic aren’t doing so hot, and the less said about my Combatant the better…”

    “Saboteur is great, but my Hydro, Cryo and Mineral abilities just aren’t good enough.” Kurusu added.

    Finally, Kuppo told his friends of his capabilities. “Swarm. Electro. Hex. Pyro. Geo. Aero… They’re all just average, none good none bad.”

    “You’ve definitely got it best, Kuppo”. Star stated. “Electro, Cryo, Geo, and Aero all allow you to manipulate raw elements, and Swarm lets you communicate with Bug Pokémon. Add in your Hexes and you’re a Jack of All Trades.”

    Kuppo responded. “Whilst that may be true, your Charms are way stronger than my Hexes, and with your Hydro you’re also a force to be reckoned with on the elemental side too. True, your other magics need work, but you have two strong magic skills to last you until you improve.”

    “I wish my Hydro could be as good as your’s Star.” Kurusu sighed.

    “Hey, you’ll improve.” The girl smiled. She then smirked as she looked at Seraph. “Besides, you’re still better at it than Bubbles.”

    A vein on Seraph’s head swelled with anger.

    “I’m trying!”

    “I know.” Star said. “But I feel like you’re forcing it because Araquanid is one of your familiars. You don’t have to use all of your familiars’ Type Magic, you could focus on ones you’re good at, like Hex.”

    “I’m going to carry on learning Hydro for Araquanid, just like you’re learning Combatant for Lopunny. You struggle, but you don’t give up. Why should I?”

    “That’s different!” Star exclaimed, raising herself up with her arms on the table. Her sudden adversity got her a few odd looks from some other restaurant patrons.

    Seraph had flinched when Star moved, but snapped out of it with a retort. “How is it, Star!? The only difference is that I’m doing it for myself and you’re doing it for-”

    “Seraph, Star, now isn’t the time to argue.” Kuppo calmly said.

    The owner had approached the table, a portly yet proud man in an ebony suit. A Ribombee fluttered around him.

    “Everything okay?” He asked, looking at Star.

    “It’s fine, I was just about to leave and get us some rooms at the local inn whilst these guys enjoy some dessert.” She calmly clarified.

    “But I don’t want desse-” Kurusu started, until a nudge from Kuppo and some daggers from Star caused him to go silent.

    “Kuppo,” Star started, reaching into her pockets, producing a silvery note from her pocket. “Pay for me.”

    After her friend had nodded, Star walked out of the restaurant, her gait betraying her calm facade.

    Seraph’s eyes followed her until she exited, before meeting Kuppo’s.

    “You need to apologise.” The boy stated.

    Seraph sighed, knowing his friend was, as usual, right. But Star had genuinely upset him, and in Seraph’s opinion should’ve known better.

    Reply

        • At least it isn’t that hard to tell the difference. Like at least it isn’t asking for something more obscure like the term for the fear of clowns(Coulrophobia) or something like that.

          Reply

          • -shrugs- I studded to become a Psychologist. Psychology’s pretty tone deaf. I mean starting with Freud you pretty much have to address that most of his theories revolved around sexual urges to realizing that animals are capable of having psychological breakdowns, myself learning it through the tragedy of Penguin Madness, which ends with a Penguin committing suicide by wondering into the ice away from the water and walking until they either die of exhaustion or starve.

            Psychology’s pretty dark.

          • Basically, I’ve studied a lot too. I just didn’t expect Aardvark love to just randomly show up

          • Well if you do peruse it as a career, you might be tasked with someone who’s into bestiality. Though I’ll admit that an aardvark is kind of an unusual choice.

          • I know, if it was something like cats or wolves I would have been prepared but fuckin Aardvarks

          • Ehh I would have assumed something like live-stock animals or something as out there as Dinosaurs, but I guess who ever wrote the question simply picked the first animal they found in the dictionary.

    • I have a qualification in psychology.
      If I had the rest of the question I could probably answer it.

      If I had to guess I’d say Sadism because Aardvarks kill ants.

      Unless this isn’t one of those psychoanalysis things and it’s just asking for the correct terminology for ‘Aardvark fetish’, in which case it’ll be D or E.

      Reply

        • Fetishism then.

          Never covered when I did psychology but I’d assume from the definition that Paraphilia must have some detrimental effect.

          I was expecting it to be some deep psychoanalysis question because when I did psychology we spent a fair bit of time studying Freud’s daft theories. Poor Wolf Man. Poor Little Hans.

          Reply

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